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However, theatres of this standard are depressingly rare. A glimpse at many regional theatre seasons reveals that the huge majority of Britain’s theatres exist on a diet of unrelenting mush. I am painfully aware of this because, for the past three years, my theatre show, Gertrude’s Secret, has been touring theatres all over the UK. We’ve played the whole range, from established regional venues such as The Minerva at Chichester, through regional artistic yet commercial powerhouses like the Oxford Playhouse, to tired venues in towns that appear to be cultural deserts, often economically devastated, clinging on for dear life to their dwindling theatre audiences.
Unfortunately, it seems to be the last category that makes up too much of Britain’s regional theatre. Again and again, we have found from talking to staff that audiences are lukewarm about straight drama but flock to stand-up comics, Elvis impersonators, tribute bands and mediums demonstrating their ‘amazing’ psychic powers. And there has been an increasing trend in the regions to put on theatrical versions of TV sitcoms, such as Dinnerladies and Porridge.
Many theatres struggle to attract audiences for what should be their raison d’être: drama. New writing, of course, hardly gets a look-in, with Wilde, Coward or Christie being as daring as many theatre programmers will go. When drama is put on, it’s often yet another production of Noises Off, a new version of Sherlock Holmes, or absolutely anything by the excellent Alan Ayckbourn — but can we please change the record occasionally?
Take, for example, the winter/spring season for the Churchill Theatre in Bromley, Kent. From 23 November to 5 June the drama consists of an Oscar Wilde play, an Agatha Christie whodunnit and — you’ve guessed it — an Ayckbourn revival. While these shows certainly look entertaining, it is a pity that some newer writing had not been programmed, too, in addition to the musicals, panto, operetta, a couple of children’s shows and Snow White on Ice which make up the remainder of the schedule.
At the Beck Theatre in Middlesex, almost everything booked so far from now to December is made up of comedians, tribute bands, musicians and musicals, mediums, children’s shows and wrestling. The only show that appears to resemble a play at all is four performances of the stage version of TV sitcom Hi-Di-Hi! in April. The Beck is part of another theatre group, HQ Theatres, and it offers similar fare at its other venues.
Council-owned theatres are often sparse with the culture, too. The website for Calderdale Council-owned Victoria Theatre in Halifax, for example, boasts a programme that includes unmissable drama. Yet blink and you will certainly miss it. Its current programme, which includes shows up until December, has the familiar mix of music-tribute shows, stand-up comedians, a medium and shows for children. The nearest it gets to conventional drama is one man single-handedly recreating The Lord of the Rings…
However, the theatres themselves should bear only part of the blame for their unimaginative programming. If experience shows that audiences will shell out only for evenings with lots of bright lights, music, dancing and laughs, why should theatres jeopardise their finances by making courageous programming moves that may drive audiences away?
I was struck by the uphill struggle one manager of a theatre in a seaside resort had in trying to break away from this music-and-mediums-type programming. He took our show, despite knowing that there were easier shows to sell. It did very well in the circumstances, but he had to pull out all the stops trying to engage the local media, instigate marketing initiatives and fight established company policy. Few theatre managers have the time or energy.
Much of the recent box-office success in the West End has been put down to star casting, with Hollywood actors increasingly being enticed to London. However, regional theatre seldom has such allure for stars, even of a C-list persuasion. Agents are often loath to hire out their stars for the time needed to rehearse and tour a play adequately enough for it to be financially viable in case their charges get a telly or film part in the interim. Stars themselves are wary of committing for fear of overload.
It doesn’t help that Arts Council grants are so elusive. I applied for a grant for the Fringe first run of Gertrude’s Secret and spent a whole day printing out and reading pages of application forms. One ludicrous request was for me to predict how many tickets would be sold. I took a guess, but was foolishly optimistic and incorrectly predicted that we would make a modest profit — and for that reason the application was rejected.
Private giving and corporate sponsorship are in decline, most seriously so in the regions. Who knows how Arts Council grants to theatre organisations, currently £112 million in England, will be affected? One thing is for sure: if health and education are going to be subject to big cuts, the arts will suffer considerably more. Such cuts at subsidised theatres will greatly affect commercial theatre, which routinely takes in hits (such as War Horse). That, in turn, will challenge regional theatre quality levels even more. Which would be a great pity.
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