Already a subscriber? Log in
I bought my daughter two chests of drawers from Habitat. They looked good and sturdy and the shop promised delivery the following week, which was a plus. On the allotted day six large cartons arrived, along with a 15-page booklet on how to assemble the pieces inside that would have tested the expertise of a professional carpenter. When we complained to the shop, a manager informed us that every piece of furniture has to be assembled by hand. ‘But you don’t have any signs to that effect and you didn’t tell us,’ we protested. ‘Everyone knows that about us,’ he sniffed. Well, we didn’t know it, and at £750 I think it’s a total rip-off. In spite of several hours’ of effort by Katy and her boyfriend, Paul, the unfortunate pieces remained scattered on the floor until the specialist arrived to put them together, which took almost three hours.
My New York friends inform me that, because of Mayor Bloomberg’s new total smoking ban in restaurants, bars and clubs, there is rebellion brewing on the streets of Manhattan. As the diehard smokers gather outside the bars and bo–tes to chatter and puff away, the smoke rises and infiltrates the open windows and the apartments of those living above. Windows have to remain closed, tempers are frayed, the residents are beyond furious, and who can blame them? This ludicrous law is the ultimate in ‘nannyism’. Of course everyone knows that smoking is bad for you, but those who choose to persist should at least be allowed designated areas in which to do it. I wouldn’t be surprised if, under this new prohibition, speakeasies started to flourish in New York, as they did in the 1920s, where people would be free to drink or eat and smoke to their heart’s content. I’m sure that these joints will thrive because everyone loves an element of the forbidden.
Wouldn’t Bloomberg do better to kick the countless druggies off the streets? Maybe we could even follow suit on that one. As for contracting cancer, becoming obese is worse for you than smoking; 35 per cent of cancer deaths are caused by poor nutrition and obesity and 30 per cent by smoking. Check it out. When is Mayor Bloomberg going to ban fast-food?
I adore browsing the open-air antique markets and like to go there in semi-disguise. Recently my daughter, Tara, and I were up at the crack of dawn perusing the stalls of Bermondsey. I was dressed down in raincoat, baseball cap and no make-up, delighted that I was getting away without being recognised. Then Tara came up and informed me that she had heard one of the stallholders talking to his slatternly wife. ”Ere, Trace, did you see that was that Joan Collins? Gor blimey, even you look better than she does!’ I grabbed Tara and said, ‘I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!’
Also in Society
Also by Joan Collins
Latest
Comments
Join the debate for just $5 for 3 months
Be part of the conversation with other Spectator readers by getting your first three months for $5.
UNLOCK ACCESS Just $5 for 3 monthsAlready a subscriber? Log in