Mary Killen
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Q. My husband and I have a cottage on a beach in Cornwall. It is little more than a shack but it’s clean and charming. Friends often beg to borrow it, even after we have shown them photos and explained how basic it is. We don’t charge, except for the cleaner, so it really rankles when they come back home and lecture us on what’s wrong with it and what we should do to put it right.
— B.M., London NW1
A. Why not leave a suggestions book and ask guests to write their recommendations in it? They’ll feel foolish reiterating the complaints of those who have borrowed the shack on earlier occasions. If they try to lecture you when they get back, gag them by saying you’d rather read the recommendations when you are on site and can take them in.
Q. A friend of mine is a grandmother. Her grandson, who is heir to a colossal inheritance, attends both state and private nurseries, depending on whether his family are in London or the country. The problem is that the state school reprimands him for saying ‘what?’ and tells him to say ‘pardon?’ but the reverse then happens in the private school. The poor boy is now getting a bit confused. What do you suggest, Mary?
— A.C., London W11
A. There is no problem here. It is good for the boy to learn to be bilingual and, when in Rome, to do what the Romans do. The camouflage may well be essential in the coming years.
Because you read about etiquette
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